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Saturday, July 25, 2009

Advice For Men On Talking To Women

Advice For Men On Talking To Women

- What's the most important thing to look for before approaching a woman?
- What should I say to a woman I'm interested in when I meet her?
- Is it OK to use pick-up lines?
- Does it help to brag about myself a little when talking to women?
- Should I ask a woman if she has a boyfriend?

- What do I do if I find out a woman I'm talking to has a boyfriend?
- How do I make a woman feel comfortable when I'm talking to her?
- What do I do if I run out of things to say to a woman?


What's the most important thing to look for before approaching a woman?

Something that a lot of guys overlook when they're approaching a woman and what they should look for is the ring on her left hand on her ring finger. If she's wearing an engagement ring or a wedding ring, why would you want to approach her unless you're interested in committing adultery which is not up my alley.

So look for that ahead of time and you could save yourself a lot of time. I cant tell you how many times I've had friends go out, chat up a woman for 30 minutes only to see that she's got a wedding ring on her finger. So make that simple choice ahead of time and you can save yourself a lot of grief.

What should I say to a woman I'm interested in when I meet her?

When you're approaching a woman and you're trying to get the conversation going, just definitely use the objects that are around you for the conversation. If you're in a bar, ask her what drink she's having and if she's enjoying it. If you're in a bookstore, ask her what book she's reading. You know, keep it very simple and the conversation will grow off that.

Now if you're not comfortable in general with talking with women, then you should probably have a list of five to ten things beforehand. Practice and prep it. Go on the internet and read about a couple interesting stories that you read that day, and read them over while you're actually going to the bar, or the bookstore, what have you, if you're going to be in a social setting. And have that information on hand when you meet a woman. Have it in the back of your mind, and you can bring that conversation up.


Is it OK to use pick-up lines?

One of the questions I get asked more than any other is 'Are pick-up lines effective in order to meet women?' And the answer is it really depends on your location. But if you're in a bar, I think its actually really helpful, and the best pick-up line that I've ever used is "Hi. My name is Archie." Now, you can use your name instead of mine, but it definitely works because you're just going up to the girl, and introducing yourself, and showing the confidence that you have.

Now as far as "cheesy pick-up lines" go, those can be effective as well, especially if you think the girl has a sense of humour. One of my best friends walked up to a table of women, and he saw a girl and said "Excuse me, do you mind if I hit on you for a while?" She cracked up, and he actually ended up marrying her because she had a sense of humour about it. So I think pick-up lines, if they're are funny and cheeky, can definitely work to your advantage.

Does it help to brag about myself a little when talking to women?

As far as like building yourself up and bragging when you first meet a woman, or singing your own praises, I definitely would say that you should probably avoid that. The one thing in my experience and especially watching all the dates on Blind Date, the thing that really attracts women is when a guy is passionate about something. When a guy is passionate about something it doesn't matter if he's really successful.

If you're an incredible poet and you're passionate about it women will pick up on that, so you don't have to have a lot of money. You don't have to be incredibly successful in what you're doing as long as you're really driven and passionate by it. Women really see this and they're attracted by it. So

I don't think you really have to talk yourself up, brag or say how much money you make or what kind of car you drive, I think that's all real clichés. Definitely there are women that are attracted to that, hence the City banker who only really cares how much money you make. But these aren't women you really want to end up with anyway so you should definitely avoid bragging.


Should I ask a woman if she has a boyfriend?

When you first meet a woman and you're not sure if she has a boyfriend or not, its actually not a bad idea to jokingly drop that into the conversation. For example, if you're in a bar situation and she's sitting at the bar and there's an empty stool next to her and you've been talking to her for 20 or 30 seconds, you can jokingly say "Oh, is your boyfriend going to come over here and beat me up because I'm talking to you?" Instantly you'll find out because shell laugh.

If she doesn't she'll laugh and say "No no no, I don't have a boyfriend", and if she does shell make a comment right there that she has a boyfriend and you can easily move on and not waste time talking to her.


What do I do if I find out a woman I'm talking to has a boyfriend?

Now I have a definite philosophy when I go out into a social situation, a bar or a party. I definitely want to meet a single woman that is available and I can potentially date. So if I find out that she has a boyfriend or a husband Ill talk to her and Ill engage in conversation, but Ill keep it very limited, because my time is very precious to me and I only have a few hours a night.

If I'm going to go out on a Friday night I have a couple of hours to try to meet a woman that I would like to date. So if I find out that someone has a boyfriend or a husband Ill talk to them and very politely say you know it was nice meeting you and move on, because I'm really not interested in these situations of making friends, I would like to find someone to date.


How do I make a woman feel comfortable when I'm talking to her?

When you're chatting with a woman, you definitely want to make her feel comfortable at all times. There are some very simple things you can do to make a woman feel comfortable.

Number one again is your body language. Definitely be aware of your body language. Be relaxed and confident n yourself and it will actually come off to her and shell be able to sense that and become comfortable. If you're nervous and jittery, she might be nervous and jittery as well.

Another good thing to do to make her comfortable is mirror her body language. If she is leaning in towards you, lean slightly towards her as well. Mirror her hand gestures. These simple things will make her more relaxed and comfortable when you're talking to her.


What do I do if I run out of things to say to a woman?

If you're talking to a woman and you run out of things to say to her that is the ideal opportunity for you to ask her for her number. Excuse yourself and say that you have friends at the bar that you have to get back to and ask her for her number.

There's no point in dragging on a conversation if you run out of things to say to her. End it right there and get her number. If she gives it to you fantastic, if not then thank her for her time and move on.


Is it best to be with friends when you're going out to meet women?

When you go out to meet women, its usually best to have friends you can fall back on and talk to from time to time. However, there'll be situations when you'll just go it alone. This is actually an excellent opportunity for someone who is not comfortable talking to women, because what its going to do is force them to meet new people. T

hey wont have their friends to talk to and they'll actually be compelled to go out and meet new people. This is excellent training, even if you're nervous. It's eventually going to allow you to feel more comfortable around people and you will be able to score those digits later on.

How do I cope with nervousness when I'm talking to a woman?

If you find yourself in a situation where you're talking to a woman and you find that you're nervous or uncomfortable or edgy, definitely do not call attention to it. Calling attention to nervousness is really not going to service you in any way, especially because the woman is probably not even going to notice herself.

She's going to be nervous too, she's going to be concerned about how she looks, how she's coming off. So don't worry about your nervousness. Just try to be as relaxed and calm as possible. And if you're not, just continue with the conversation. Whatever comes out of your mouth is fine, just keep the conversation going and the flow will eventually get you back to the place where you feel more confident and less nervous.

How can I succesfully transition from talking to one woman to another?

There definitely are situations where you'll be chatting with a group of women and you are interested in one, and then as you're talking you'll become more attracted to another one. She might have an incredible personality, make you laugh and you might be like, Oh my god, I want to meet this girl. If that's the case, then definitely go with the flow. Because what will happen is that if both women are single and interested, there'll actually be a little rivalry going on and they'll both be seeking out your attention. So its really a win-win situation for you.

Should I try to kiss a woman the first time I meet her?

Whether or not you kiss a girl the first time you meet her is entirely dependent on the situation. If you meet a girl in a social situation, such as a party or a bar and there is alcohol involved, and if she is a little tipsy and her body language is showing you that she is interested in you, by all means you should try to kiss her.

If you are in a situation such as a supermarket, you're on the street or in a bookstore, it's obviously going to be a little different. However, if she still telling you with her body language and with her words that she is interested in you, then a little kiss wouldn't hurt at all either. What you really need to do is look at her body language, see if the tell tale signs are there: Is she leaning into you when she is talking to you? Is she touching you a lot? If she is touching your arm a lot and if she is touching your hair, there are clear signs that she is interested in you in a physical way.

What do I do if I realize I'm not interested in a woman after I approach her?

If you're realizing when talking with a woman that you are no longer interested in her, you should definitely, by all means, leave that situation. But do it in a very tactful manner. Tell her that you have to get back to your friends and that it was a pleasure meeting her. You won't be lying. It truly is a pleasure, because obviously you were attracted to her across the room enough for you to approach her.

After you spoke to her, you might not have been attracted on an intellectual level, and that's fine, but you really were attracted to her at one point. The fact that you were able to walk up to her, approach her, is great. That's great on your part, so it really was a pleasure for you to do that. You wouldn't be lying and you'll also be able to go on your way and talk to the next woman.

How do I cope with being rejected by a woman after meeting her?

If you're talking to a woman and she no longer wants to talk to you, and she moves away or she rejects you, do not let this ruin your evening in the least. In fact, you should really build on it. You were able to go up to her and talk to her and that's a great thing.

Remember, in the back of your mind, rejection is so much better than regret. You went for it, you went out there, you went out on a limb, you spoke with her. You never have to wonder, "What if?", you got your answer. So what if she rejected you? It could've been for a million reasons; don't take it personally. She could've got fired from work that day, she could have a boyfriend she's still in love with - there are a million reasons. Just buck up, look around the room, and find the next woman you're interested in, and go and talk to her.

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Thanks for watching our video Advice For Men On Talking To Women For more how to videos, expert advice, instructional tips, tricks, guides and tutorials on this subject, visit the topic Asking A Woman Out.


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